Tuesday, February 1

Fuck my life

Today, my mum tried to hook me up with a guy. I'm a lesbian. I have been for two years. She's even met my girlfriend. FML

Today, I decided to wake my fiance up by giving him a blow-job. When he finally started to wake up he called me by his ex's name. FML

Today, my girlfriend finally got a Facebook account. Too bad she doesn't know the difference between a wall post and a message. She just described how much she enjoyed our sex last night, in great detail. My mom liked it. FML

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